This is Julie Christine and this my Tantra (Self Love and Awareness) journal from 2000-2006. At the turn of the Century I went on a search for my inner light and Purpose and had intention to come to terms with being a single woman with no children (I was 32 at the time and never married). I set out on a Life Path to know myself and Enlighten. I decided to document my life and feelings as i learned my lessons in Love. My Path led me through sexual healing and spiritual awakening. Please be aware some content is of the sexual nature as i went on a quest to know myself as a Woman/Soul in relation to Life, Man, World, and God. I found my passion for Peace, to Save Tibet and Stop War. I found my voice and my love for all beings. I found ONENESS. I found profound LOVE.
I offer these intimate moments with myself so that others may relate to the journey of Awakening Self Love and subsequent Universal Love and the evolution of Mind. I learned about Love through experiencing the pain of rejection and witnessing war on terror. My journal is candid and is not edited. Please read with an understanding eye. Many entries were written in pain (either intense personal love heartbreak pain or Woman pain witnessing Man Leader bringing War as tradition)
My path is unique and led to 2008 where i call myself Liberty and I am completely at Peace with never marrying or having children. I found my soul and united it with GOD/Buddha/Jesus/Light/etc. i am here to share my light with the world in whatever way the world can receive.
If you are going to read, I would recommend you begin at the blog beginning titled 1999 - A death. That way the entries might make more sense. I can't figure out how to list these entries in chronological order for ease in reading and i aplogize for that. May all feel love inside and hope as a united human kind race.
Peace and Love, Liberty :)
For the next two years i wrote on a blog which can be found at www.libertyinmaui.gaia.com
Dharma - Jesus - Love - and Me
Lama ‘G’ gives me an Apple on his doorstep J
in his doorway under the King sign. He tells me it is from a shrine. He asks me to take a bite as I stand before him. I say thank you, acknowledge the moment fully in my heart, and bite. He says, ‘good bite.’ I smile.
He has taken the time to look up my birthdate so that I can know what animal I am in Tibetan calendar. Fire Sheep he tells me I am.
He is Fire Monkey I find out because I ask him and he tells me.
I spill ink on ME and the office carpet
3.23.06 My dreams lately
Two nights ago I had a dream I was at the dharma center in Paia. I was coming out of Lama’s house and he was rounding the corner in his carport. He smiled and jokingly said , ‘ah Master Julie!” I laughed because in my dream he was playing with my ‘boy self.’
He told me there was a room available for me but he didn’t tell me which one.
He left and I was with a girl who was showing me my room except she didn’t really know either. There were rooms that all had a loft part to them. She said all the rooms had them. I was confused because the room she was showing me was in the main area where everyone used the bathroom and walkway and kitchen. It didn’t seem like a room.
I remember I left to get some of my things but I wasn’t sure where my flip flops were. I went to my bike which was a mini motorcycle which I could fold into two parts. I debated if it was too dangerous to ride the short trip to my house with bare feet.
I was happy to be going there even though it was confusing to me where my room was. There were other women who lived there and they seemed nice and also cleaned for a living.
Greg dream
Last night I dreamt of Greg. He came to me as the one who was coming to claim me. I didn’t get to really look at him even though he stood silently before me for quite some time. I was having a reaction and he was just there giving me the dignity to have it.
I said a few things and wondered if he was already changing his mind. I was already letting him down.
It wasn’t sad for me, but it made me aware that I squash the joy out of anything in my dreams when Greg comes. I do this. Not him. I wish I could experience another way, but it must be habit or something.
Continually processing the programmed response of female wanting male to want to stay even if she is doing things which made others leave.
Whatever.
June: Gemini Rising
I’m writing in a new journal. First page.
Today after work, Sonam told me she had good news. That news is that His Holiness the Dalai Lama is coming to MAUI!!!!! In April 2007.
Ahhhh, a perfect day. I feel it all beginning to finally come together.
Right now I am sitting in the Haiku Laundromat. Soon I will head home to watch Oprah.
Jesus and Mary stuff everywhere lately – especially with DaVinci code movie.
A friend, Kelly, used to work in this Laundromat. He died a few months ago and now they have his picture hanging in here.
I’m so glad. It’s good to see him.
6.6.06 Subject: GREG
What I learned from the internet. 2/19/61 is birthdate. Chinese OX. Pisces/Aquarius cusp
June 22 Dragon change of guard to Pisces.
Month of July 1 – Aug. 2 is SUPER NOVA opening.
Greg on vacation all month
He acknowledges (via an article on his webpage) that withholding information from another can be painful for that person.
I feel like a lone vase. Only a stem in me. Petals are all gone and my water is only filled with sad tears.
My daily life is similar to the Julie in Charlottesville and yet it is totally different. Single, female, Living alone in a house with a job and away from family. 5years later the experience of myself is completely different.
Nothing seems to change in the ZEN COACH file. Still no news. No anything. No contact. Nada. None. No communicado.
I want to have a dream tonight……with my twin soul. My wish and prayer before I lay my head down to sleep.
Later that evening…
11:17pm. Not sleepy, but it is time. Work comes tomorrow 8am.
Sweet dreams, dreamer.
Sorry you cry so much
Sorry Greg withholds from you.
Sorry you keep living the same day in hawaii/heaven over and over but with no change in outer hell or past life relationships.
Keep holding on to HOPE for global and personal change.
Keep believing in GREG’s POWER
Keep your sense of humor about it.
Keep it fresh.
In the morning….my dream
Well, my dream last night was with Oprah rather than Greg.
We were in the same house. I was making friends with her in the same way a puppy makes friends with it’s new mom/caregiver.
She was sitting cross legged on the living room floor talking to a few people.
I was sleeping upstairs and woke up and came downstairs.
As I came down the stairs I saw her sitting on the floor and
I was so happy.
I went straight to her and layed my head in her lap while she carried on with her conversation.
Maybe I was a puppy?
I could tell she was also getting to know me and finding love for me.
We were new acquaintances.
I love having Oprah or Greg in a dream. Even the sad dreams. I have noticed that in dreams, I can touch Oprah. In my dreams we have hugged, she has put her hand on my back, my head in her lap, etc….
I never touch Greg in dreams.
Julie’s Life Learning and Teaching Mission from Jesus
Dear anybody who cares
My physical aches. Daily it seems. I try to work thru it like others who work in far more extreme external challenges. I wonder if because my heart has taken so many beatings that sometimes my physical body pays the price.
I cry so much my head/neck always feel full and somewhat heavy.
I guess working through aches links me with more inner strength.
I think of Amma’s mission and then I think of my African sisters in pain and I work through it. I make my day and my work and my pain have deep deep meaning. If I did not, I feel my daily life/existence simply has no meaning to the world. Seems impossible when I wake up to each day feeling the world.
My personal life is demolished and my service is all I have left. To feel the reality of my life and service having no meaning/impact on the world is torture for me. Maybe this is why I feel borderline feverish so often. Internal emotional pain.
Oprah is on the island as I write this. I try not to think about it (cuz it makes me ache even more) but that’s impossible. To hope for a surprise meeting with her year after year is really tough. I actually, truly, NEED HER. I had no idea this was going to be my fate.
Daily tears.
Daily aches.
Daily no healthy word from loved ones.
….and Daily I try to keep my strength and energy. Some days it’s so hard.
George Bush and Father energy was hitting me last week.
This week it is only my body that is bothering me.
We worked for 4 hours in one house and now we are going to Willie Nelson’s house to clean some more.
I don’t feel like cleaning more, but if my co-workers can do it – I can do it.
My days are not happy, but I believe in my days and my use of my time and energy.\
I believe in Me.
Today is SUPERMAN RETURNS movie release which of course brings up all the emotion of my visions/prayers with Chris Reeve.
I am split in two and trying to hold it together when in front of other people. I have no choice. I am in this world. I have to somehow manage these extremes of emotion, heartbreak,ultimate reality, and Earth reality this JUNE 2006.
Please God, help me feel better. I really really want to feel better. Especially physically.
Love,
Your Daughter,
Julie Christine.
My Life Mission: Prove Power of Prayer
Message: When you love the qualities of the Man Jesus, he sits with you. You become L.O.V.E. whether ♂ or ♀.
Qualities of Light awaken in your organs.
Embodiment happens.
in his doorway under the King sign. He tells me it is from a shrine. He asks me to take a bite as I stand before him. I say thank you, acknowledge the moment fully in my heart, and bite. He says, ‘good bite.’ I smile.
He has taken the time to look up my birthdate so that I can know what animal I am in Tibetan calendar. Fire Sheep he tells me I am.
He is Fire Monkey I find out because I ask him and he tells me.
I spill ink on ME and the office carpet
3.23.06 My dreams lately
Two nights ago I had a dream I was at the dharma center in Paia. I was coming out of Lama’s house and he was rounding the corner in his carport. He smiled and jokingly said , ‘ah Master Julie!” I laughed because in my dream he was playing with my ‘boy self.’
He told me there was a room available for me but he didn’t tell me which one.
He left and I was with a girl who was showing me my room except she didn’t really know either. There were rooms that all had a loft part to them. She said all the rooms had them. I was confused because the room she was showing me was in the main area where everyone used the bathroom and walkway and kitchen. It didn’t seem like a room.
I remember I left to get some of my things but I wasn’t sure where my flip flops were. I went to my bike which was a mini motorcycle which I could fold into two parts. I debated if it was too dangerous to ride the short trip to my house with bare feet.
I was happy to be going there even though it was confusing to me where my room was. There were other women who lived there and they seemed nice and also cleaned for a living.
Greg dream
Last night I dreamt of Greg. He came to me as the one who was coming to claim me. I didn’t get to really look at him even though he stood silently before me for quite some time. I was having a reaction and he was just there giving me the dignity to have it.
I said a few things and wondered if he was already changing his mind. I was already letting him down.
It wasn’t sad for me, but it made me aware that I squash the joy out of anything in my dreams when Greg comes. I do this. Not him. I wish I could experience another way, but it must be habit or something.
Continually processing the programmed response of female wanting male to want to stay even if she is doing things which made others leave.
Whatever.
June: Gemini Rising
I’m writing in a new journal. First page.
Today after work, Sonam told me she had good news. That news is that His Holiness the Dalai Lama is coming to MAUI!!!!! In April 2007.
Ahhhh, a perfect day. I feel it all beginning to finally come together.
Right now I am sitting in the Haiku Laundromat. Soon I will head home to watch Oprah.
Jesus and Mary stuff everywhere lately – especially with DaVinci code movie.
A friend, Kelly, used to work in this Laundromat. He died a few months ago and now they have his picture hanging in here.
I’m so glad. It’s good to see him.
6.6.06 Subject: GREG
What I learned from the internet. 2/19/61 is birthdate. Chinese OX. Pisces/Aquarius cusp
June 22 Dragon change of guard to Pisces.
Month of July 1 – Aug. 2 is SUPER NOVA opening.
Greg on vacation all month
He acknowledges (via an article on his webpage) that withholding information from another can be painful for that person.
I feel like a lone vase. Only a stem in me. Petals are all gone and my water is only filled with sad tears.
My daily life is similar to the Julie in Charlottesville and yet it is totally different. Single, female, Living alone in a house with a job and away from family. 5years later the experience of myself is completely different.
Nothing seems to change in the ZEN COACH file. Still no news. No anything. No contact. Nada. None. No communicado.
I want to have a dream tonight……with my twin soul. My wish and prayer before I lay my head down to sleep.
Later that evening…
11:17pm. Not sleepy, but it is time. Work comes tomorrow 8am.
Sweet dreams, dreamer.
Sorry you cry so much
Sorry Greg withholds from you.
Sorry you keep living the same day in hawaii/heaven over and over but with no change in outer hell or past life relationships.
Keep holding on to HOPE for global and personal change.
Keep believing in GREG’s POWER
Keep your sense of humor about it.
Keep it fresh.
In the morning….my dream
Well, my dream last night was with Oprah rather than Greg.
We were in the same house. I was making friends with her in the same way a puppy makes friends with it’s new mom/caregiver.
She was sitting cross legged on the living room floor talking to a few people.
I was sleeping upstairs and woke up and came downstairs.
As I came down the stairs I saw her sitting on the floor and
I was so happy.
I went straight to her and layed my head in her lap while she carried on with her conversation.
Maybe I was a puppy?
I could tell she was also getting to know me and finding love for me.
We were new acquaintances.
I love having Oprah or Greg in a dream. Even the sad dreams. I have noticed that in dreams, I can touch Oprah. In my dreams we have hugged, she has put her hand on my back, my head in her lap, etc….
I never touch Greg in dreams.
Julie’s Life Learning and Teaching Mission from Jesus
Dear anybody who cares
My physical aches. Daily it seems. I try to work thru it like others who work in far more extreme external challenges. I wonder if because my heart has taken so many beatings that sometimes my physical body pays the price.
I cry so much my head/neck always feel full and somewhat heavy.
I guess working through aches links me with more inner strength.
I think of Amma’s mission and then I think of my African sisters in pain and I work through it. I make my day and my work and my pain have deep deep meaning. If I did not, I feel my daily life/existence simply has no meaning to the world. Seems impossible when I wake up to each day feeling the world.
My personal life is demolished and my service is all I have left. To feel the reality of my life and service having no meaning/impact on the world is torture for me. Maybe this is why I feel borderline feverish so often. Internal emotional pain.
Oprah is on the island as I write this. I try not to think about it (cuz it makes me ache even more) but that’s impossible. To hope for a surprise meeting with her year after year is really tough. I actually, truly, NEED HER. I had no idea this was going to be my fate.
Daily tears.
Daily aches.
Daily no healthy word from loved ones.
….and Daily I try to keep my strength and energy. Some days it’s so hard.
George Bush and Father energy was hitting me last week.
This week it is only my body that is bothering me.
We worked for 4 hours in one house and now we are going to Willie Nelson’s house to clean some more.
I don’t feel like cleaning more, but if my co-workers can do it – I can do it.
My days are not happy, but I believe in my days and my use of my time and energy.\
I believe in Me.
Today is SUPERMAN RETURNS movie release which of course brings up all the emotion of my visions/prayers with Chris Reeve.
I am split in two and trying to hold it together when in front of other people. I have no choice. I am in this world. I have to somehow manage these extremes of emotion, heartbreak,ultimate reality, and Earth reality this JUNE 2006.
Please God, help me feel better. I really really want to feel better. Especially physically.
Love,
Your Daughter,
Julie Christine.
My Life Mission: Prove Power of Prayer
Message: When you love the qualities of the Man Jesus, he sits with you. You become L.O.V.E. whether ♂ or ♀.
Qualities of Light awaken in your organs.
Embodiment happens.
March 2006 Maui Dharma Center for Maid Service
Maui Dharma Center
I get to do MA.id service for the Venerable Lama Gyaltsen
3.9.06 Mary Sayard and Me get to clean at Lama’s House AND Temple!!!!
3.10.06 Today I get to Attend to Lama’s office and Temple alone (i LOVE working Alone)
While I am cleaning Lama’s office he comes briefly in to tell me he is going into town for a few hours. As he walks behind me I smell his cologne. His presence and smell move me in a most beautiful way. I have needed to encounter holy presence and manly smell. I murmur under my breath the following words, ‘purity on man smells so f___ing good.’
Oops. Hope temple spirits don’t mind my expressional choices of words which flew out of my mouth! I smile. I love this day. I love this job and I love how my daily movements threw life brought me into the presence of a holy, sexy, and pure radiant man on path of teaching wisdom. We both have taken celibacy vows and we both radiate a peace with such a mission. This I find supremely innocent and magnetic between two healthy human forms of male and female. His smile is warm and it was nice to have a man pass by me that left me with such a nice memory of a man smelling like a man and it not triggering anything but sweet love and reverence for man. That moment was my most special moment of the day. Good for my psyche today because I am always in ‘process’ with the human male as a sexual energy consciously channeled into spiritual mission. These male forms and missions make me happy to be a woman able to thank holy man on earth in any way he can receive it. I encounter the divine feminine’s greatest desire. To please and make happy and make pleasure for divine man in every dimension of his life. Especially in his 3rd dimensional temple. Core Primary female instinct in me. to love and serve the divine in man.
3.11.06
I need someone who sees, understands, and has compassion for my pain – unseen pain since 2002 on journey into MMary, Humbleness, and Aloneness. My kindred spirit needs this when I asked her what she most needs/hopes for with Oprah or Greg ever coming back into her life.
She hopes Op’s gets the pain part of me even though I carry it well and much has passed by me already. To connect with another who truly gets it without me having to tell what or why something hurts will feel like someone knows me from the inside out. Understands my journey and feels compassion for me b/c sometimes the strong girl in me wants a friend who ALREADY knows the past and it has touched them deeply in compassion – for and with , me.
To understand the heart pain I have faced while walking alone. I need this only because the aching part of my soul needs to have a human experience where what I have been through is actually acknowledged as painful by another human being.
Beating, torture, rapes and all the other terror that others are experiencing is horrific physical brutality human against human. My pain was not physical and did not come from brutality and yet is real. It feels very real to me and brings tears up in me that come from deep wells inside my memory channels and my empathy/compassion channels.
Just because it is not happening to me does not mean I do not feel what is happening to others.
To hangout with another who knows me intimately and gets that part of me will be super amazing for the little girl in me who wanted this whole time to have just one other human to share with in those dark and alone moments where I pretended and found my comfort in the unseen realm.
So yes, I found the gift in that aloneness but having a friend who understands the emotional spiritual journey I took in my heart at those times and the agony it survived will be a blessing.
IF I had an emotional ‘need’ of another human being = that would be it.
3.14.06
Reality, Death, and ME
The moment brought us to the gate of Death.
We love each other but Brutality and Hate
- mortal reality - wants us to believe it can separate us.
I saw him injured.
They took him from me.
They thought if they took his body
They could end us.
Death says I can’t see him again
until I join Death too.
Death wants me to believe it is the only way, but I say bullshit.
I cannot let this be our ultimate reality because it is not the way.
Before they took him he said he would come back.
He said nothing would separate us.
To have Faith in the Power of US.
He said Love would always stay together.
No matter how much pain was put between us.
We would remain.
He Promised.
I promised.
Our souls could do nothing else.
They took him away and said he is gone.
I gave everything in my soul to see him again and I did.
He went through the Death door alone and didn’t get lost.
He knew exactly how to get back and where to find me.
(he always did have an amazing sense of direction!)
I found through experience that when love knows who it is
It can recognize itself with or without a body
It can then direct itself where it wants to go
Back to what it loves and where it is needed.
I also found, through experience,
that the soul can be recognized by that which loves it
Even if it comes in an altered state or form.
He came back and
I recognized him.
The message I received is
never let go and NEVER underestimate the POWER of LOVE
For it is your ULTIMATE ReALity.
Now, again I get a message from Death and ‘Reality.’
One that I have to swallow, but do not have to believe.
Death is making his strike in my reality again.
But I am not buying the story.
My heart won’t let me
I am unable to fully believe that what they say is true.
Mary taught me to trust what my heart says
Especially when it comes to Miracles and Death.
3 years ago I felt the Reality of a Super Hero walking again on Earth.
The world told me that was IMPOSSIBLE.
Science backed it up.
I dared Reality - and my reputation -
and said for the world to see…
I hear your reality, but I BELIEVE in miracles and I believe he will walk.
I believe.
I announced myself and thus defined my Spiritual Identity
at the Gate of Saint Jude
My One Alladin wish was used.
One per life.
I defined it, explained it, and projected how my one wish would create Peace on Earth and bring People’s of all Tribes together again.
I stood before the karmic board
And I projected my vision.
My plan plus the magic of my one Celestial wish
Could and WOULD awaken Humans to ULTIMATE REALITY.
A year later, reality tests my Faith even more
The Death force stepped in and delivered to me a message.
He is now Dead they said.
Not only will he never walk again.
He will not live anymore, because he is gone.
Death took the body that I was busy healing.
NOOOO! I cry. Not this again.
So now I find I am in Death reality on Earth
Yet carry the Truth of my Ultimate Reality inside me.
Now, the final blow to my heart and Alladin Wish
They say that now Death took his Beloved
She died they say.
His Angel.
And HE the one who came to deliver the message.
Gone. Leaving a child boy without his Parents.
NO. I do not believe.
I cannot believe.
Just as I knew of another way then
And that I was to be part of it.
I hold on to another way now.
I do not believe what Reality tells me
My heart says its miracle time.
It’s been saying so for 3 years now.
Love and Truth.
Holy men and the women who love them surviving on Earth.
Beloved Twin souls who defy death and mortal reality.
This is what I believe in.
They love beyond the limits of the body.
Even when death (or paralysis) takes over a body
The two remain united as ONE LOVE.
Magic.
Two Defined Essences – one male and one female
Always carrying the third Essence the two create together
The Spirit of Eternal Love – making the trinity
I cannot believe the story as it is written.
My story is much better.
HE does walk.
HE does comes back.
So does SHE.
It is my Ultimate Reality.
It must be.
For it is ALL I CAN SEE.
My continued prayer for Chris and Dana Reeve.
And MY ultimate reality to merge
ON EARTH.
History is repeating itself.
With Love and Prayers,
Julie Christine
I get to do MA.id service for the Venerable Lama Gyaltsen
3.9.06 Mary Sayard and Me get to clean at Lama’s House AND Temple!!!!
3.10.06 Today I get to Attend to Lama’s office and Temple alone (i LOVE working Alone)
While I am cleaning Lama’s office he comes briefly in to tell me he is going into town for a few hours. As he walks behind me I smell his cologne. His presence and smell move me in a most beautiful way. I have needed to encounter holy presence and manly smell. I murmur under my breath the following words, ‘purity on man smells so f___ing good.’
Oops. Hope temple spirits don’t mind my expressional choices of words which flew out of my mouth! I smile. I love this day. I love this job and I love how my daily movements threw life brought me into the presence of a holy, sexy, and pure radiant man on path of teaching wisdom. We both have taken celibacy vows and we both radiate a peace with such a mission. This I find supremely innocent and magnetic between two healthy human forms of male and female. His smile is warm and it was nice to have a man pass by me that left me with such a nice memory of a man smelling like a man and it not triggering anything but sweet love and reverence for man. That moment was my most special moment of the day. Good for my psyche today because I am always in ‘process’ with the human male as a sexual energy consciously channeled into spiritual mission. These male forms and missions make me happy to be a woman able to thank holy man on earth in any way he can receive it. I encounter the divine feminine’s greatest desire. To please and make happy and make pleasure for divine man in every dimension of his life. Especially in his 3rd dimensional temple. Core Primary female instinct in me. to love and serve the divine in man.
3.11.06
I need someone who sees, understands, and has compassion for my pain – unseen pain since 2002 on journey into MMary, Humbleness, and Aloneness. My kindred spirit needs this when I asked her what she most needs/hopes for with Oprah or Greg ever coming back into her life.
She hopes Op’s gets the pain part of me even though I carry it well and much has passed by me already. To connect with another who truly gets it without me having to tell what or why something hurts will feel like someone knows me from the inside out. Understands my journey and feels compassion for me b/c sometimes the strong girl in me wants a friend who ALREADY knows the past and it has touched them deeply in compassion – for and with , me.
To understand the heart pain I have faced while walking alone. I need this only because the aching part of my soul needs to have a human experience where what I have been through is actually acknowledged as painful by another human being.
Beating, torture, rapes and all the other terror that others are experiencing is horrific physical brutality human against human. My pain was not physical and did not come from brutality and yet is real. It feels very real to me and brings tears up in me that come from deep wells inside my memory channels and my empathy/compassion channels.
Just because it is not happening to me does not mean I do not feel what is happening to others.
To hangout with another who knows me intimately and gets that part of me will be super amazing for the little girl in me who wanted this whole time to have just one other human to share with in those dark and alone moments where I pretended and found my comfort in the unseen realm.
So yes, I found the gift in that aloneness but having a friend who understands the emotional spiritual journey I took in my heart at those times and the agony it survived will be a blessing.
IF I had an emotional ‘need’ of another human being = that would be it.
3.14.06
Reality, Death, and ME
The moment brought us to the gate of Death.
We love each other but Brutality and Hate
- mortal reality - wants us to believe it can separate us.
I saw him injured.
They took him from me.
They thought if they took his body
They could end us.
Death says I can’t see him again
until I join Death too.
Death wants me to believe it is the only way, but I say bullshit.
I cannot let this be our ultimate reality because it is not the way.
Before they took him he said he would come back.
He said nothing would separate us.
To have Faith in the Power of US.
He said Love would always stay together.
No matter how much pain was put between us.
We would remain.
He Promised.
I promised.
Our souls could do nothing else.
They took him away and said he is gone.
I gave everything in my soul to see him again and I did.
He went through the Death door alone and didn’t get lost.
He knew exactly how to get back and where to find me.
(he always did have an amazing sense of direction!)
I found through experience that when love knows who it is
It can recognize itself with or without a body
It can then direct itself where it wants to go
Back to what it loves and where it is needed.
I also found, through experience,
that the soul can be recognized by that which loves it
Even if it comes in an altered state or form.
He came back and
I recognized him.
The message I received is
never let go and NEVER underestimate the POWER of LOVE
For it is your ULTIMATE ReALity.
Now, again I get a message from Death and ‘Reality.’
One that I have to swallow, but do not have to believe.
Death is making his strike in my reality again.
But I am not buying the story.
My heart won’t let me
I am unable to fully believe that what they say is true.
Mary taught me to trust what my heart says
Especially when it comes to Miracles and Death.
3 years ago I felt the Reality of a Super Hero walking again on Earth.
The world told me that was IMPOSSIBLE.
Science backed it up.
I dared Reality - and my reputation -
and said for the world to see…
I hear your reality, but I BELIEVE in miracles and I believe he will walk.
I believe.
I announced myself and thus defined my Spiritual Identity
at the Gate of Saint Jude
My One Alladin wish was used.
One per life.
I defined it, explained it, and projected how my one wish would create Peace on Earth and bring People’s of all Tribes together again.
I stood before the karmic board
And I projected my vision.
My plan plus the magic of my one Celestial wish
Could and WOULD awaken Humans to ULTIMATE REALITY.
A year later, reality tests my Faith even more
The Death force stepped in and delivered to me a message.
He is now Dead they said.
Not only will he never walk again.
He will not live anymore, because he is gone.
Death took the body that I was busy healing.
NOOOO! I cry. Not this again.
So now I find I am in Death reality on Earth
Yet carry the Truth of my Ultimate Reality inside me.
Now, the final blow to my heart and Alladin Wish
They say that now Death took his Beloved
She died they say.
His Angel.
And HE the one who came to deliver the message.
Gone. Leaving a child boy without his Parents.
NO. I do not believe.
I cannot believe.
Just as I knew of another way then
And that I was to be part of it.
I hold on to another way now.
I do not believe what Reality tells me
My heart says its miracle time.
It’s been saying so for 3 years now.
Love and Truth.
Holy men and the women who love them surviving on Earth.
Beloved Twin souls who defy death and mortal reality.
This is what I believe in.
They love beyond the limits of the body.
Even when death (or paralysis) takes over a body
The two remain united as ONE LOVE.
Magic.
Two Defined Essences – one male and one female
Always carrying the third Essence the two create together
The Spirit of Eternal Love – making the trinity
I cannot believe the story as it is written.
My story is much better.
HE does walk.
HE does comes back.
So does SHE.
It is my Ultimate Reality.
It must be.
For it is ALL I CAN SEE.
My continued prayer for Chris and Dana Reeve.
And MY ultimate reality to merge
ON EARTH.
History is repeating itself.
With Love and Prayers,
Julie Christine
Celstial Erotica of a Guardian Angel
Night Watcher
Our next appointment is in his bedroom. Bedtime. I am there to observe his habits. I have a chair in the room and I sit and hang with him. Sometimes talking with him – sometimes not.
I watch his body. I watch him. Constantly. My eyes are on him. He must carry on as if I am not there watching him. Yet when I speak to him and make a request or ask him a question he always responds and complies.
He is now getting ready for bed. A nighttime shower to unwind the day’s collected energy with water rolling over his head and down down down refreshing all cells and bringing forth purity and innocence in his being as that which he has cleaned for us during the day is now rinsed easily off him. This is his ritual. The spiritual warrior nightly returns to his primal state of innocence as he washes before bed. Returning to relaxed purity before he lays himself down to bed.
Tonight I see this ritual and am glad the evening naturally includes the removal of all his clothes. I enjoy watching him exposed and him feeling my gaze on him 100%.
He cannot initiate conversation as he is supposed to be pretending I am not there. Except of course when I talk to him and then he is responsive because he is 100% aware that I am there even though he is to move as if he is alone. So that I can see what he’s like alone. And yet – not alone. Fun for me. Especially now in this shower time he has. Oh I love it when he takes his clothes off because it seems vulnerable to me and this strong man looks so beautiful when he is vulnerable.
Him being naked around me feels like a gift because he is so beautiful and trusting of me and the love we feel for ourselves and each other. Oh the job of a guardian angel of a divine man is oh so fun!
Especially one who is aware enough of my presence to keep me there entertained because of his natural state of wonder. I am so glad this is my job. That this is where I am needed. A guardian who isn’t protecting from danger, but rather guarding and building in boy/man spiritual strength and sexual power and ways to play with the sacred feminine. Venus visits man and enjoys the visit and comes back again and again because man is fun to play with.
This one makes eye contact with me as he steps out of the shower. Seems he’s not averting his gaze from me during his bedtime ritual. It is fine gazing upon him as he gazes back. 3rd dimensional recognition of angels with bodies is the greatest part of this game. Oh how happy I am that this is in the 3rd dimension! Oh, he comes closer towards the bed now.
He is nude and his hair is damp.
He stops at his altar.
He kneels.
He is beautiful.
He lights a candle and picks up a picture.
The Actor and our special room
Our next appointment is in his bedroom. Bedtime. I am there to observe his habits. I have a chair in the room and I sit and hang with him. Sometimes talking with him – sometimes not.
I watch his body. I watch him. Constantly. My eyes are on him. He must carry on as if I am not there watching him. Yet when I speak to him and make a request or ask him a question he always responds and complies.
He is now getting ready for bed. A nighttime shower to unwind the day’s collected energy with water rolling over his head and down down down refreshing all cells and bringing forth purity and innocence in his being as that which he has cleaned for us during the day is now rinsed easily off him. This is his ritual. The spiritual warrior nightly returns to his primal state of innocence as he washes before bed. Returning to relaxed purity before he lays himself down to bed.
Tonight I see this ritual and am glad the evening naturally includes the removal of all his clothes. I enjoy watching him exposed and him feeling my gaze on him 100%.
He cannot initiate conversation as he is supposed to be pretending I am not there. Except of course when I talk to him and then he is responsive because he is 100% aware that I am there even though he is to move as if he is alone. So that I can see what he’s like alone. And yet – not alone. Fun for me. Especially now in this shower time he has. Oh I love it when he takes his clothes off because it seems vulnerable to me and this strong man looks so beautiful when he is vulnerable.
Him being naked around me feels like a gift because he is so beautiful and trusting of me and the love we feel for ourselves and each other. Oh the job of a guardian angel of a divine man is oh so fun!
Especially one who is aware enough of my presence to keep me there entertained because of his natural state of wonder. I am so glad this is my job. That this is where I am needed. A guardian who isn’t protecting from danger, but rather guarding and building in boy/man spiritual strength and sexual power and ways to play with the sacred feminine. Venus visits man and enjoys the visit and comes back again and again because man is fun to play with.
This one makes eye contact with me as he steps out of the shower. Seems he’s not averting his gaze from me during his bedtime ritual. It is fine gazing upon him as he gazes back. 3rd dimensional recognition of angels with bodies is the greatest part of this game. Oh how happy I am that this is in the 3rd dimension! Oh, he comes closer towards the bed now.
He is nude and his hair is damp.
He stops at his altar.
He kneels.
He is beautiful.
He lights a candle and picks up a picture.
The Actor and our special room
Celestial Erotica of Celibate Tantric Maid
NAMO AMITABHA BUDDHA
Sometime soon is Greg’s Day of Birth
I’m not sure when, but someday soon is Greg’s birthday. I think his Birthday is Sunday. Today is Friday. His Birthday weekend. Happening Now.
Totally sucks that I’m not part of the celebration of his birth. A day where he gets to make a wish. A day where the man feels the love gifts given to him from those whose lives he has touched who get to celebrate his birth with him…meanwhile there is me here alone thinking that my weekend plans would be very different this year if I were a part of his life as a personal contact sort of way. Then I could be a guest invitee to his birthday party.
Yea. I wish.
Whatever.
Wishing just makes the weekend feel longer and more dragged out in front of me. Plus, even if I were at a party, I probably wouldn’t be much fun anyway because I feel so affected lately – in a detached, odd, painfully miserable kind of way.
I carry my misery well, yet still I ache.
Last night was terrible. Cried and ached and I couldn’t do anything but feel it yet again.
Today- much better.
His Birthday Weekend. In some other life out there I would totally get off on throwing him a party – yet in this life I find myself not even sure where I am going to live beginning March 1st and I am counting limited but hard earned funds for my housing. I am in survival mode yet I know he’ having a Birthday so this makes me pleased (that he is alive and really exists).
I mailed him a Valentine Card and a Birthday Card this year.
My first time ever.
I wish I was his Birthday Wish.
Signing off,
JC
March
If I were to desire a Man – here he is
IF I were to want a man….this is what he would be like
I want a Man who believes in being Young, Happy and Sexy Forever.
I want a Man who speaks with the Spirits of Love and Compassion
And who Moves with the Spirits of Compassion and Passion.
I want a Man who knows how to play to WIN.
I want a Man who is not threatened by my thirst to explore compassion to the World and Passion to One.
I want a Man who wants to be that One.
I want a man who will then agree to give me two more men of my choosing just for ‘FUN.’
I want a man who knows how to throw sacred rituals and 21st Century Healing Parties.
I want a Man who will set fire to my dreams and have them explode into 3rd dimensional reality for all the word to see.
I want a Man who can get the peoples attention.
I want a man who believes in me.
I want a man who is devoted to upholding the dignity of the Divine Feminine in all ways.
I want a man who can be naked and make me laugh. I want a man who doesn’t care if I mock the penis. I want a man who will play healing games with me with his penis to help me work out my issues towards global man
I want a man who will help me build schools and temples all around the world to bring humanity back to its senses.
I want a man who likes to do stuff with me in person.
I want a man who knows how to smile, cry, weep, smirk and tease.
I want a Man who can and will time travel with me.
I want a Man who will play dress up with me.
I want a Man who wants me.
I want a man who sees Sita and Ram.
Om Guru Om Guru Principle Energy teach me and bring me your light.
3.6.06
Life Death. And Spiritual Awakening. Which one will get you first? Life without spiritual awakening is walking Death and not easy to Live. To get awake while alive is to survive death while it is trying to get you to buy into its program.
Your mind separates you with your free will into a life program or death program. Most are a garbled up program of mixed messages coming from you because you don’t know your death patterns and if you do – many keep paying the renewal price on their membership with the Death squadron.
LIFE: Life says plant a seed whether you can see how or where they will grow. Watch the seeds Oprah and her network of Angels have planted watch/feel how a bit of inspiration and love will grow and grow and grow. Never believe that you cannot affect a change on Earth. We are A League of Love on Planet Earth. No more individual armies of killing machines in human form. No. We are a male/female network of divine humans acting out our love upon life on Earth. We are a very powerful team and our players are multiplying fast. It has happened. Is happening. And will be so apparent soon that we will personally feel it’s bliss if we haven’t yet already. Awakened humans. Built for love. Built for genius caring amazing inventions. Life everlasting because we want to live as an individual and as a species.
DEATH:
Death tells us we cannot affect a change. Death/Suffering tells us that it is too strong to ever change. It’s carriers will teach you that people don’t change. That old dogs don’t LEARN. Death will make you feel little, weak, and ineffective to help people feel better.
Don’t listen to death. Death comes in the form of pessimism. You hear a conversation about our famine or our pedophiles or our war on terror and Death will caringly shake it’s head in dismay and say too bad. It’s hopeless. It’s gone too far and is too widespread – people will suffer until humans extinct themselves with their own freewill and nothing you can do will change it.
See this on a personal level. Arguments Death uses to manipulate itself into your agenda’s and beat you at your own game because you believe
Example Pollution of our environment:
1.Weakness (not strong enough to kick death habit)
2. Freedom/Freewill (smokers say it’s their freewill to poison themselves and others – they stand on the virtuous platform of Freedoms of live as they desire, but are excersiceng the right to die/kill others rather than the freedom to live in health, life and purity
With guns – it’s the freedom to kill or ‘protect’ democracy. Both are stupid thought patterns that Death sells you and you buy and act out.
3. Death voices will hide in your spiritual and religious platforms and will use them against you. Follow a Death pattern (like disprespecting women and or another human life ) but call it a religion and stand on your ‘freedom to worship’ platform in the name of renewing your membership with death.
Death is in thoughts. How you justify actions. Actions you take. How you treat another who is helping you live. …death voices are mean to people who help you live. Just ask a smoker to quit smoking and see how death speaks! They will jump on the bandwagon of it’s not your business and they have the ‘right’ to blow poison in the air or more directly at you. They have anger or hurt/hate and don’t know how to heal it so they spread it instead.
Pay attention to what you say on the inside and you will consciously be programming and deprogramming your Life/Death programs. You are the only one that can break a death pattern for yourself. It is the ultimate FREEWILL folks!
3.8.06 Celesial Erotica in the 3rd Dimension
Players - A teen, A monk, An Actor, A Buddha, A president and a DAKINI
The DATE
He has expressed interest in me. He has invited me to his house. As his special guest. He knows I believe him to be special and he feels something for me too. I am told he will come pick me up, or send someone for me.
I think he is cool in the ways that I like in man. I am attracted to his character and presence. He plays the guitar. He has a pool at his house. A hot tub. A grill. A beach. He has decorated for my coming. He has invited a small gathering. A party where I am his date, but it is new for me in so many ways. He understands this and has compassion.
He and I don’t talk too much while everyone is there. We are getting acquainted with the inside feelings while being in the presence of one another knowing what we know about our mutual attraction. He is chivalrous to me. He introduces me and gets me a special drink glass just for me, he says. He seems proud to have me as his date. I like a guy like this. I like how he is treating me.
He understands I don’t see guys as boyfriends anymore. My eyes are different now yet a part of me wants to reawaken the 18 yr old girl in me who wants to be alone in a pool at night with one. He knows I want to want this yet don’t. But do.
He gets it and is drawn to me more because he knows he can help me. He likes me. I can tell by the way he meets my eyes from across the room at the party.
We’re sitting outside in a circle on the beach. Guitars, drums, the guys are making music around the bonfire and we are all enjoying the moment.
The folks direct the party to the town. The guy and me stay behind. It is now time for us to be alone. We are becoming friends and feel very comfortable around each other. We tell each other verbally what we think and feel in the moment we are creating together. He is comfortable with words and he has an enjoyable sense of humor and confidence. He and I are both sort of shy by nature and we like this about each other. I trust him and like feeling like we are friends. Of any age. We are now innocent young friends who are playing together. Young boy and his young friend, a girl. There are no sexual feelings in this young spirit of children making friends with the opposite sex.
We play ping pong. We play music. We play with food. Then, we decide to get into the pool.
This is when is started happening. As I am in the familiar bathroom putting on my bathing suit, my playful spirit begins to age into a woman feeling drawn to the man putting his suit on at the same time. My insides begin to feel different. Thickness. More quiet. Apprehensive.
We join each other out by the pool and he can feel the shift too. There is a bit of delicious tension. We sit next to each other with just our feet dangling in the water. The moment is smooth. Our legs are touching. His right touching my left. There is a Goddess lying behind us in stone. He is close enough for me to smell a very masculine fragrance on him and I am drawn in with desire to move my head close to him. I rest my head down on his shoulder and breathe in. I feel my feet in the water and his right foot loops around my left foot and entwines our legs. This slippery feeling of our legs touching while simultaneously inhaling his fragrance and feeling his solid male shoulder is pure lovely.
My legs are reminded of dolphins and mermaids and my upper senses are breathing air and smelling and feeling man presence. Kind and compassionate. Talented and humble male presence. Sexy and sweet man. Man who feels something move inside him when he is near me.
A thickness comes as he knows I carry in my head a crown open to the heavens. When I breathe in he knows the energy which comes out of me is for him. Only him. The one I have chosen to share this innocent first moment with. He is wise enough to never act upon his desire to kiss me, but to always be very open to receiving touch from my lips. He knows that if that gateway is ever opened to him that he too will open his crown and allow the stars to join in the energy of our kiss.
I do not kiss him as it turns out. Not tonight. My adult female sexual spirit has returned to its box and knows that out next meeting shall perhaps lead to the joining of our mouths.
He and I sit there with our feet in the water and as I am absorbing the feeling of his powerful and respectful restraint yet at the same time feeling his expression of his desire and willingness to open his mouth to me. This is helping my desire to kiss grow.
I am detached now from my desire but totally aware of his. It is now time for us to play with his desire and his pleasure. To begin the experiment. I ask him how he is feeling. He is so honest and truthful in his speaking to me. He is swollen between his legs and this makes me happy. He is respectfully owning his own energy and not putting it on me. I am drawn to his erection and his responsible use of it.
I ask him if he will take off his bathing suit and reveal himself to me. He confides he surprisingly feels shy and a bit nervous and very excited. I am so glad he feels things. He is so confident – his shyness, like mine, is from innocence and reverence not insecurity. It is sexy to me.
He looks at me and says it will be his pleasure to do anything I ask of him. He pardons himself and gets up. He goes inside and changes the music playing on the speakers. I take this opportunity to fluff the cushions we sit upon and bring the candle from the table down to the ground near where we sit.
It is quiet except for the waves from the ocean making their steady movement behind where we sit.
He returns. He is wearing a red robe with gold markings on it. He comes to me and kneels on one knee and says to me that he trusts me with his heart, his thoughts, his feelings and his sex. He tells me that he feels safe with me. I am glad.
He sits next to me again with his robe. We both know he wears nothing underneath.
‘It is time for you to demonstrate your words,’ I say.
He smiles and opens his robe. He puts his hands behind him and leans back a little bit and looks up to the sky. He closes his eyes and murmurs something to the night sky. A prayer, an offering, a something. He is in his experience of exposing innocence to innocence for the sake of healing and pleasure. He has offered himself to me and it is clear to me he is glad he made this brave decision as his sex is awake and oh so beautiful.
I tell him to lie back because I need to make an offering of prayer to the Gods and the stars overhead. I tell him he will be touched for 3 minutes at some point. My hands will be commencing this moment and our joining intentions. I request that if at any time he feels he will spill his seed he is to tell me for this will not do. That is much far later in our togethering and far too powerful of a substance to touch or see before we seal our covenant of truth, pleasure, and innocence with kiss first.
He agrees but tells me this is all new for him too. ‘Communication with me is key,’ I say. I tell him all the things of my prayer and tell him that after this we are going out to rejoin the party. He seems happy at the entire plan. Me too.
He holds both of my hands and kisses the tops of them.
I acknowledge his act of respect and lay his head down on the soft cushion behind him.
I ask him to be very still and quiet. No sound just to breathe. If something must come out of him, I ask it to be sound and not semen. He agrees. I ask him to internalize every sensation and pathway owning his insides and to mark the moments we are making on his sacred pleasure highway.
Now – it begins. All speaking is done. I kneel to his right and look up the night sky. I look down at this beautiful Man child stripped of clothes and male hair around his sacred area. His body is smooth like mine. I need to examine the male body. So beautiful. I need to make friends with this most scary of appendages. I need to experience innocence and masculinity in one. Looking upon this man is not scary at all. Oh he is most perfect.
He is also looking quite sweet lying so still with this eyes closed yet knowing I am staring at him in any way I want. He allows. He surrenders and trusts me. He is tuning into pure love.
‘Please open your legs more so I can see,’ I ask.
He spreads his legs so that now there is a wider V form of his lower body. His erection is getting stronger with no touch as the request for more vulnerability touched something inside him and joined him in empathy to many plays of such scenes. He feels his inside innocent female. Our scene is pure divinity – this is what allows him to tune in to female empathy as the female in him feels herself freewillingly open her legs to the opposite sex to be explored.
He is tuning into his experience so that he can write in his journal.
I begin examining his body with my eyes and energy. Sometimes there is touching here and there.
Getting acquainted with male flesh on innocent lovely friend who has given himself over to me.
I paint on the inside of his legs with my color set. I have marked him.
I do not touch his lingam yet allowing its energy to explore all this newness of activity in his brain and in and around sex. I know that once I make contact with his lingam that I am only allowed 3 minutes uninterrupted to mark our first meeting.
When I can tell he is ready and the time to make him glisten has come.
I reach for the glitter magic oil and tell him I am going to make his lingam glisten like a star in the sky.
The cup of oil we have must be poured over his body. I rise from kneeling and now stand above him. Make my blessing and offering and I stand over his sacred area and slowly empty the bowl onto his belly and sacred area. I allow it to make contact and drip and spread on its own accord. The wind blows. He is in his moment and feeling his body and elements connect. I ask him to raise his hips and allow the moon to see him. He does.
While he is raised I hold my palm open and hold my hand over his sacred area. I ask him to lift up until his lingam makes contact with my palm. He does.
I kneel and put pressure in my hand pushing his pelvis back down to the ground. I hold my hand steady on him as the star of david begins to heat up in the tip of his lingam and in the palm of my hand. His triangle and my triangle begin to connect and spin. He feels this.
My hand rotates on him. The energy is in motion. To the right. Now the left. Ever so lightly I introduce him to the pearl of a woman. The energy radiating from him that can feel my touch with all the electricity between the two energy bodies. This most tender tip of him can also help him understand woman sensations.
He follows my instructions perfectly. Intensely experiencing and internalizing all. He is 100% present.
He is enjoyable to watch as he attempts to internalize all while not moving or making sound. He feels my touch. It is clear this connection we have is going to be very enjoyable over the course of our nights together.
I chose wisely.
He is the right one.
He receives the highest of marks from his Dakini.
He is instructed to carry this strength, passion, desire, and sacredness out with us. I tell him to always let his energy flow in his genitals when with me. If we are out and he gets swollen he is not to resist. He is to document it. Sing about it. Journal about it. He is my toy. My friend. I feel protective of him and I know I am his guardian angel. Come to love him and teach him in person.
I am glad we can have more dates together.
We change. We both look hot. We both look happy. We both are turned on by each other.
I tell him to grab his guitar.
It is time to intermingle our intimacy with the public.
Sometime soon is Greg’s Day of Birth
I’m not sure when, but someday soon is Greg’s birthday. I think his Birthday is Sunday. Today is Friday. His Birthday weekend. Happening Now.
Totally sucks that I’m not part of the celebration of his birth. A day where he gets to make a wish. A day where the man feels the love gifts given to him from those whose lives he has touched who get to celebrate his birth with him…meanwhile there is me here alone thinking that my weekend plans would be very different this year if I were a part of his life as a personal contact sort of way. Then I could be a guest invitee to his birthday party.
Yea. I wish.
Whatever.
Wishing just makes the weekend feel longer and more dragged out in front of me. Plus, even if I were at a party, I probably wouldn’t be much fun anyway because I feel so affected lately – in a detached, odd, painfully miserable kind of way.
I carry my misery well, yet still I ache.
Last night was terrible. Cried and ached and I couldn’t do anything but feel it yet again.
Today- much better.
His Birthday Weekend. In some other life out there I would totally get off on throwing him a party – yet in this life I find myself not even sure where I am going to live beginning March 1st and I am counting limited but hard earned funds for my housing. I am in survival mode yet I know he’ having a Birthday so this makes me pleased (that he is alive and really exists).
I mailed him a Valentine Card and a Birthday Card this year.
My first time ever.
I wish I was his Birthday Wish.
Signing off,
JC
March
If I were to desire a Man – here he is
IF I were to want a man….this is what he would be like
I want a Man who believes in being Young, Happy and Sexy Forever.
I want a Man who speaks with the Spirits of Love and Compassion
And who Moves with the Spirits of Compassion and Passion.
I want a Man who knows how to play to WIN.
I want a Man who is not threatened by my thirst to explore compassion to the World and Passion to One.
I want a Man who wants to be that One.
I want a man who will then agree to give me two more men of my choosing just for ‘FUN.’
I want a man who knows how to throw sacred rituals and 21st Century Healing Parties.
I want a Man who will set fire to my dreams and have them explode into 3rd dimensional reality for all the word to see.
I want a Man who can get the peoples attention.
I want a man who believes in me.
I want a man who is devoted to upholding the dignity of the Divine Feminine in all ways.
I want a man who can be naked and make me laugh. I want a man who doesn’t care if I mock the penis. I want a man who will play healing games with me with his penis to help me work out my issues towards global man
I want a man who will help me build schools and temples all around the world to bring humanity back to its senses.
I want a man who likes to do stuff with me in person.
I want a man who knows how to smile, cry, weep, smirk and tease.
I want a Man who can and will time travel with me.
I want a Man who will play dress up with me.
I want a Man who wants me.
I want a man who sees Sita and Ram.
Om Guru Om Guru Principle Energy teach me and bring me your light.
3.6.06
Life Death. And Spiritual Awakening. Which one will get you first? Life without spiritual awakening is walking Death and not easy to Live. To get awake while alive is to survive death while it is trying to get you to buy into its program.
Your mind separates you with your free will into a life program or death program. Most are a garbled up program of mixed messages coming from you because you don’t know your death patterns and if you do – many keep paying the renewal price on their membership with the Death squadron.
LIFE: Life says plant a seed whether you can see how or where they will grow. Watch the seeds Oprah and her network of Angels have planted watch/feel how a bit of inspiration and love will grow and grow and grow. Never believe that you cannot affect a change on Earth. We are A League of Love on Planet Earth. No more individual armies of killing machines in human form. No. We are a male/female network of divine humans acting out our love upon life on Earth. We are a very powerful team and our players are multiplying fast. It has happened. Is happening. And will be so apparent soon that we will personally feel it’s bliss if we haven’t yet already. Awakened humans. Built for love. Built for genius caring amazing inventions. Life everlasting because we want to live as an individual and as a species.
DEATH:
Death tells us we cannot affect a change. Death/Suffering tells us that it is too strong to ever change. It’s carriers will teach you that people don’t change. That old dogs don’t LEARN. Death will make you feel little, weak, and ineffective to help people feel better.
Don’t listen to death. Death comes in the form of pessimism. You hear a conversation about our famine or our pedophiles or our war on terror and Death will caringly shake it’s head in dismay and say too bad. It’s hopeless. It’s gone too far and is too widespread – people will suffer until humans extinct themselves with their own freewill and nothing you can do will change it.
See this on a personal level. Arguments Death uses to manipulate itself into your agenda’s and beat you at your own game because you believe
Example Pollution of our environment:
1.Weakness (not strong enough to kick death habit)
2. Freedom/Freewill (smokers say it’s their freewill to poison themselves and others – they stand on the virtuous platform of Freedoms of live as they desire, but are excersiceng the right to die/kill others rather than the freedom to live in health, life and purity
With guns – it’s the freedom to kill or ‘protect’ democracy. Both are stupid thought patterns that Death sells you and you buy and act out.
3. Death voices will hide in your spiritual and religious platforms and will use them against you. Follow a Death pattern (like disprespecting women and or another human life ) but call it a religion and stand on your ‘freedom to worship’ platform in the name of renewing your membership with death.
Death is in thoughts. How you justify actions. Actions you take. How you treat another who is helping you live. …death voices are mean to people who help you live. Just ask a smoker to quit smoking and see how death speaks! They will jump on the bandwagon of it’s not your business and they have the ‘right’ to blow poison in the air or more directly at you. They have anger or hurt/hate and don’t know how to heal it so they spread it instead.
Pay attention to what you say on the inside and you will consciously be programming and deprogramming your Life/Death programs. You are the only one that can break a death pattern for yourself. It is the ultimate FREEWILL folks!
3.8.06 Celesial Erotica in the 3rd Dimension
Players - A teen, A monk, An Actor, A Buddha, A president and a DAKINI
The DATE
He has expressed interest in me. He has invited me to his house. As his special guest. He knows I believe him to be special and he feels something for me too. I am told he will come pick me up, or send someone for me.
I think he is cool in the ways that I like in man. I am attracted to his character and presence. He plays the guitar. He has a pool at his house. A hot tub. A grill. A beach. He has decorated for my coming. He has invited a small gathering. A party where I am his date, but it is new for me in so many ways. He understands this and has compassion.
He and I don’t talk too much while everyone is there. We are getting acquainted with the inside feelings while being in the presence of one another knowing what we know about our mutual attraction. He is chivalrous to me. He introduces me and gets me a special drink glass just for me, he says. He seems proud to have me as his date. I like a guy like this. I like how he is treating me.
He understands I don’t see guys as boyfriends anymore. My eyes are different now yet a part of me wants to reawaken the 18 yr old girl in me who wants to be alone in a pool at night with one. He knows I want to want this yet don’t. But do.
He gets it and is drawn to me more because he knows he can help me. He likes me. I can tell by the way he meets my eyes from across the room at the party.
We’re sitting outside in a circle on the beach. Guitars, drums, the guys are making music around the bonfire and we are all enjoying the moment.
The folks direct the party to the town. The guy and me stay behind. It is now time for us to be alone. We are becoming friends and feel very comfortable around each other. We tell each other verbally what we think and feel in the moment we are creating together. He is comfortable with words and he has an enjoyable sense of humor and confidence. He and I are both sort of shy by nature and we like this about each other. I trust him and like feeling like we are friends. Of any age. We are now innocent young friends who are playing together. Young boy and his young friend, a girl. There are no sexual feelings in this young spirit of children making friends with the opposite sex.
We play ping pong. We play music. We play with food. Then, we decide to get into the pool.
This is when is started happening. As I am in the familiar bathroom putting on my bathing suit, my playful spirit begins to age into a woman feeling drawn to the man putting his suit on at the same time. My insides begin to feel different. Thickness. More quiet. Apprehensive.
We join each other out by the pool and he can feel the shift too. There is a bit of delicious tension. We sit next to each other with just our feet dangling in the water. The moment is smooth. Our legs are touching. His right touching my left. There is a Goddess lying behind us in stone. He is close enough for me to smell a very masculine fragrance on him and I am drawn in with desire to move my head close to him. I rest my head down on his shoulder and breathe in. I feel my feet in the water and his right foot loops around my left foot and entwines our legs. This slippery feeling of our legs touching while simultaneously inhaling his fragrance and feeling his solid male shoulder is pure lovely.
My legs are reminded of dolphins and mermaids and my upper senses are breathing air and smelling and feeling man presence. Kind and compassionate. Talented and humble male presence. Sexy and sweet man. Man who feels something move inside him when he is near me.
A thickness comes as he knows I carry in my head a crown open to the heavens. When I breathe in he knows the energy which comes out of me is for him. Only him. The one I have chosen to share this innocent first moment with. He is wise enough to never act upon his desire to kiss me, but to always be very open to receiving touch from my lips. He knows that if that gateway is ever opened to him that he too will open his crown and allow the stars to join in the energy of our kiss.
I do not kiss him as it turns out. Not tonight. My adult female sexual spirit has returned to its box and knows that out next meeting shall perhaps lead to the joining of our mouths.
He and I sit there with our feet in the water and as I am absorbing the feeling of his powerful and respectful restraint yet at the same time feeling his expression of his desire and willingness to open his mouth to me. This is helping my desire to kiss grow.
I am detached now from my desire but totally aware of his. It is now time for us to play with his desire and his pleasure. To begin the experiment. I ask him how he is feeling. He is so honest and truthful in his speaking to me. He is swollen between his legs and this makes me happy. He is respectfully owning his own energy and not putting it on me. I am drawn to his erection and his responsible use of it.
I ask him if he will take off his bathing suit and reveal himself to me. He confides he surprisingly feels shy and a bit nervous and very excited. I am so glad he feels things. He is so confident – his shyness, like mine, is from innocence and reverence not insecurity. It is sexy to me.
He looks at me and says it will be his pleasure to do anything I ask of him. He pardons himself and gets up. He goes inside and changes the music playing on the speakers. I take this opportunity to fluff the cushions we sit upon and bring the candle from the table down to the ground near where we sit.
It is quiet except for the waves from the ocean making their steady movement behind where we sit.
He returns. He is wearing a red robe with gold markings on it. He comes to me and kneels on one knee and says to me that he trusts me with his heart, his thoughts, his feelings and his sex. He tells me that he feels safe with me. I am glad.
He sits next to me again with his robe. We both know he wears nothing underneath.
‘It is time for you to demonstrate your words,’ I say.
He smiles and opens his robe. He puts his hands behind him and leans back a little bit and looks up to the sky. He closes his eyes and murmurs something to the night sky. A prayer, an offering, a something. He is in his experience of exposing innocence to innocence for the sake of healing and pleasure. He has offered himself to me and it is clear to me he is glad he made this brave decision as his sex is awake and oh so beautiful.
I tell him to lie back because I need to make an offering of prayer to the Gods and the stars overhead. I tell him he will be touched for 3 minutes at some point. My hands will be commencing this moment and our joining intentions. I request that if at any time he feels he will spill his seed he is to tell me for this will not do. That is much far later in our togethering and far too powerful of a substance to touch or see before we seal our covenant of truth, pleasure, and innocence with kiss first.
He agrees but tells me this is all new for him too. ‘Communication with me is key,’ I say. I tell him all the things of my prayer and tell him that after this we are going out to rejoin the party. He seems happy at the entire plan. Me too.
He holds both of my hands and kisses the tops of them.
I acknowledge his act of respect and lay his head down on the soft cushion behind him.
I ask him to be very still and quiet. No sound just to breathe. If something must come out of him, I ask it to be sound and not semen. He agrees. I ask him to internalize every sensation and pathway owning his insides and to mark the moments we are making on his sacred pleasure highway.
Now – it begins. All speaking is done. I kneel to his right and look up the night sky. I look down at this beautiful Man child stripped of clothes and male hair around his sacred area. His body is smooth like mine. I need to examine the male body. So beautiful. I need to make friends with this most scary of appendages. I need to experience innocence and masculinity in one. Looking upon this man is not scary at all. Oh he is most perfect.
He is also looking quite sweet lying so still with this eyes closed yet knowing I am staring at him in any way I want. He allows. He surrenders and trusts me. He is tuning into pure love.
‘Please open your legs more so I can see,’ I ask.
He spreads his legs so that now there is a wider V form of his lower body. His erection is getting stronger with no touch as the request for more vulnerability touched something inside him and joined him in empathy to many plays of such scenes. He feels his inside innocent female. Our scene is pure divinity – this is what allows him to tune in to female empathy as the female in him feels herself freewillingly open her legs to the opposite sex to be explored.
He is tuning into his experience so that he can write in his journal.
I begin examining his body with my eyes and energy. Sometimes there is touching here and there.
Getting acquainted with male flesh on innocent lovely friend who has given himself over to me.
I paint on the inside of his legs with my color set. I have marked him.
I do not touch his lingam yet allowing its energy to explore all this newness of activity in his brain and in and around sex. I know that once I make contact with his lingam that I am only allowed 3 minutes uninterrupted to mark our first meeting.
When I can tell he is ready and the time to make him glisten has come.
I reach for the glitter magic oil and tell him I am going to make his lingam glisten like a star in the sky.
The cup of oil we have must be poured over his body. I rise from kneeling and now stand above him. Make my blessing and offering and I stand over his sacred area and slowly empty the bowl onto his belly and sacred area. I allow it to make contact and drip and spread on its own accord. The wind blows. He is in his moment and feeling his body and elements connect. I ask him to raise his hips and allow the moon to see him. He does.
While he is raised I hold my palm open and hold my hand over his sacred area. I ask him to lift up until his lingam makes contact with my palm. He does.
I kneel and put pressure in my hand pushing his pelvis back down to the ground. I hold my hand steady on him as the star of david begins to heat up in the tip of his lingam and in the palm of my hand. His triangle and my triangle begin to connect and spin. He feels this.
My hand rotates on him. The energy is in motion. To the right. Now the left. Ever so lightly I introduce him to the pearl of a woman. The energy radiating from him that can feel my touch with all the electricity between the two energy bodies. This most tender tip of him can also help him understand woman sensations.
He follows my instructions perfectly. Intensely experiencing and internalizing all. He is 100% present.
He is enjoyable to watch as he attempts to internalize all while not moving or making sound. He feels my touch. It is clear this connection we have is going to be very enjoyable over the course of our nights together.
I chose wisely.
He is the right one.
He receives the highest of marks from his Dakini.
He is instructed to carry this strength, passion, desire, and sacredness out with us. I tell him to always let his energy flow in his genitals when with me. If we are out and he gets swollen he is not to resist. He is to document it. Sing about it. Journal about it. He is my toy. My friend. I feel protective of him and I know I am his guardian angel. Come to love him and teach him in person.
I am glad we can have more dates together.
We change. We both look hot. We both look happy. We both are turned on by each other.
I tell him to grab his guitar.
It is time to intermingle our intimacy with the public.
Feb 2006 Sex Fantasy with Saint Valentine
My sex Fantasy Today
Everyone stops having sex.
Remembers soul
Feels love
Touch hands
Unite hearts
Help each other
Kiss each other
Kiss some more
Pick one to do more with
Join the class
Do more with the person
My fantasy sex life Feb. 2006
Julie Christine.
Dear Valentine
Dear Valentine,
I might stay up all night tonight just for something fun and different. I might smoke pot all night too for a slumber party affect... Or I might just go to bed soon like I always do. I don’t know yet.
Right now my little blonde kitty cat friend is taking my attention and making it a little tricky writing this.
Kitty wants to touch and be close to me, but Kitty also has claws at end of her paws which she sticks out when she feels good and happy. We’re working it out so that I get no scratches as we hang together.
She also is interested in this paper and pen.
Now, she sleeps at my feet. Easier to write now.
Watching Playboy mansion on t.v. Saw Olympic Opening Ceremony earlier. Saw the White Dove made of humans – cried.
Venus birth girl in shell – cried.
Out on my own again to another place Feb 28th. Unless I get a rescue. A Valentine. You. One who wants me. Asks for me. Comes calling for me and helps me find a place to call home.
Or, I’ll do it on my own.
Again.
JC
Valentines Day
Evolution of Will: Living in a Man’s World the past 2,000 years – Woman’s World ready to be TASTED!
Who is the Weaker Sex? Who is stronger? Let the Games begin. First let’s review past performance of the sexes and what Collective MALE has brought to the Game called LiFE and what Collective FEMALE has brought to the game called life.(which is helping it continue and which is helping it end?)
Past performance and scores now tallied.
New Female Leadership for Earth NOW beginning it’s Peaceful, but Powerful TakeOVER. Who loves LIFE and cares for LIFE better – MEN or WOMEN through the ages? Who is really stronger and by what variables is strength measured? Emotional strength. Spiritual Strength. Strength to survive in brutal man world.
Evolution.
Who survives and why?
Earth in for BIG change.
Old worlds and New worlds collide in the NOW. I will break it down for you simply. Who has heard, said, believed or felt the following statement as True…
‘You are living in a Man’s World.’
All of you? Correct. That’s because you have been. And if you are suffering…maybe you will now realize why. Perhaps now, male or female you will be more open for the change…because ‘Man in charge with Woman Weak’ paradigm has consequences that you are most likely a slave to at this very moment. This paradigm is now being overthrown by powerful women and the men who love us.
A man’s world….What does this statement mean? History will answer that for you. His Story. He is the law maker, the law breaker, the law enforcer. The bringer of War. The Self commanded teacher of religions, He will be the ruler in the home. The first rank. The lead commander. He will decide who is given what. He will decide who is better than who (happy with boy baby – don’t like girl baby). He will make his gender the Ruler and the other Gender – Female – the extra, the servant, the receptor of his ‘power’/seed, his reproducer, his punching bag, his follower. He will make her weak. He will try to make her dumber. He will devalue her. He will cover her up. He will try to silence her and keep her separate from other women. He will try to keep her smaller than he (impossible – but he tries)
These values of male/female will be accepted as tradition and ‘the way things are.’ If you come from a Man’s world you do not speak out against his ‘authority.’
HE will betray the human race life code of ethics and LOVE. He will kill. He will like to play with killing machines. He will be obsessed with death and pain. He will misuse his sex organ for making violence. He will correlate physical strength with his strength as a man. He will possess and he will try to dominate. Following HIM will bring the world to it’s current state NOW. Terror. War. Famine. Sodomy. Murder. Empty sex with Pain and Suffering everywhere. Insanity.
We will have to transcend being part of A teaching of manhood in the human race of male programming to devalue and defame LIFE and the Female in every way. A race of males that uses females for pleasure, anger release, or as reproduction machines to be used as often as possible so that it will feel stronger in numbers too. A race of demented male mentality ruling your hearts, brains, governments and religions
This Mans world is nothing new to EARTH or Woman. Or children.
Welcome to the conditional world of Mortal Earth Man. HELL. He makes himself Superior. He is a slave to weakness while playing strong with humanity paying the dear cost.
Man setting up a system which betrays LIFE, personal responsibility and the Feminine Power. Look at it closely.
Women have to receive this male energy and live with it. Survive it. We have to share Earth with a Male dominated mentality which is Mortal and Powerfully Resistant to Life, Love and Happiness. Just ask George Bush. He tells us on t.v. that he has a very hard job. Yes, it is terribly hard to fight all the time and live behind the scenes in paranoia. Please, George – let me show you how it is done the simple and easy way.
Evolution tells you it is the Female who assures tribes survive because she uses her God given Life energy to care for the offspring. (spreading LIFE) Even if dark male spirit put his seed in her without her pemission. Female instinct is to feed what comes out of her. To Love. Help life live.
The current American Government regime is designed to kill you. Whether you live somewhere out there or inside it’s ‘boundaries.’ Whether you believe it or not. It is true.
Why? Because it’s foundation is faulty because Mortal Men are running the show.
They know no better – it is the sign of the times. Yet, now I must ask you, Who is better qualified to be the Commanding Officer of Bringing Freedom and Peace to the World – Our George Bush or Me – a Female. Lady Liberty.
Stupid, asleep, pre- programmed Americans will still feel safer with George in charge with his War on Terror than ME a woman named Julie speaking for Liberty..
I’m tired of women addicted to weak men. And I’m really tired of emotionally and spiritually weak men putting themselves in charge and then taking us to war or raping us or our children. We will never get strong as female if we keep letting weak men rule us.
Females can now ween themselves off of weakness and their addiction to getting attention from weak males and looking to them for answers, Leadership, or Protection.
Women are being fooled because they cannot see while they are entwined within.
I say without them you are YOU.
Come with me and I will show you YOU
They are afraid of you because they are weak and are afraid of strong.
If you do not feel strong – know that you are a by-product of living in a (weak) ‘man’s world’ and be willing to let your addiction to weakness and MAN go.
Be addicted to strength by finding it in yourself. Then you will be able to see these men who surround you with clearer eyes and you will demand higher standards for your chosen partner to mate with!
If you put something in your hands (a gun) which is created to end life you mark yourself as a death ray and unwilling to walk the way of nonviolence. Non – human spirit in human vehicle acting out it’s desire to die and bring pain to itself and others.
To be human is to support life and feed the living with wisdom, food and kindness. Not bullets and semen and lies.
To support life. This is the Mother. Mother can be carried in males and females. First comes the desire not to kill! Self or another! The desire Not to hate. Self or another.
I say this….Earth will no longer be a playground for weak man disease to be inflicted upon its inhabitants any longer. Only a moron would think men are the stronger sex given the global state of affairs and the tallying of who’s been in charge through the ages! How are things going so far? How has Man treated his Female counterpart on Earth. For that matter, how has man treated himself? His offspring? Seems to me they are addicted to Death.
Men who can’t cry, don’t know how to process emotions and nurture it’s young are weak. Men who kill – sick. Men who can’t even clean up after themselves…pathetic. Emotional weakness. Mental weakness and Spiritual weakness combined with physical strength, erection, bullets and bombs. It is everywhere but now we can see it for what it is. Sick and Weak. We do a disservice to men if we allow this teaching to continue. Understand this and then look at that which calls itself ‘man’ and decide for yourself if he is attractive to you. Especially if he brings his ego in with his wallet and calls you a Gold Digger and hits you if you 'disrespect him'. Ugh. It’s time for the end of that era!
Who has made life hard on us and brought violence? Man. Take a look around. It should be obvious. Who has been in charge over the course of the last few centuries? Females have been programmed to believe we will die without man. Programmed to believe Women need a man. Why? To protect us? From what? Man. Our regimes globally have been set up for the Weak, Stupid and Angry Male to be in charge – does anyone question this?
The Truth is Man needs woman. And if he feels weak but wants to be strong, he will do whatever necessary to make sure he has what he wants as he wants it. He sucks energy from her in all directions. Look at your videos. It’s base programming for 3rd dimensional male.
Don’t continue to buy into that weakness ladies and stop devoting your time to getting a man! Someday, Yes, Have a man who meets your standards. A Divine and Enlightened man, But right now your standards are muddied and far too low. Become A whole human. First a female must be enlightened into her own mind/heart. She needs to rid herself of the lie pattern working it’s way through her body that relates her self worth to male opinion and/or treatment.
She must cast out her addiction to needing male attention to feel alive and of value on Earth. Sexual dependency on man. That is what the men want you to do but it is not what your Holy spirit desires for you to do. Decision time. Commitment time ladies.
The Era of Female Addiction to man is now ending. Weak man is out of style.
Buddha boys and men on path of enlightenment only kind worth spending any of your precious energy on. Leave the outdated weak small minded brutal boys to me. I am here to help them. The only way I can help them is to convince you to follow me and leave the men alone. Get to know your own energy and strengths. Learn the ART of BEING FEMALE before you go mixing it with weak male who disrespects the feminine. Don’t let him. Take yourself out of that game. It’s a Womans world now. We only play games with Men who know how to love, live, and serve LIFE.
Reprogram your brains, your yoni’s and your social structures. Build it from a female perspective. One of unity. Divine Feminine instincts. You must unite with your own power and higher consciousness individually in the mirror before you can represent female in the mating game and be able to choose properly and wisely and especially before you go reproducing and raising a little feminine spirit – male or female ! Your energy is needed in the world to help us heal ourselves of Man World. Stop wasting your precious energy. The Suffering Children on the planet are crying out for you to help them!
1st step – stop defining your Self or your value based on Mortal Male input! Get strong. Get out there and help! Join the Network and begin your life anew. Now. Amen.
Everyone stops having sex.
Remembers soul
Feels love
Touch hands
Unite hearts
Help each other
Kiss each other
Kiss some more
Pick one to do more with
Join the class
Do more with the person
My fantasy sex life Feb. 2006
Julie Christine.
Dear Valentine
Dear Valentine,
I might stay up all night tonight just for something fun and different. I might smoke pot all night too for a slumber party affect... Or I might just go to bed soon like I always do. I don’t know yet.
Right now my little blonde kitty cat friend is taking my attention and making it a little tricky writing this.
Kitty wants to touch and be close to me, but Kitty also has claws at end of her paws which she sticks out when she feels good and happy. We’re working it out so that I get no scratches as we hang together.
She also is interested in this paper and pen.
Now, she sleeps at my feet. Easier to write now.
Watching Playboy mansion on t.v. Saw Olympic Opening Ceremony earlier. Saw the White Dove made of humans – cried.
Venus birth girl in shell – cried.
Out on my own again to another place Feb 28th. Unless I get a rescue. A Valentine. You. One who wants me. Asks for me. Comes calling for me and helps me find a place to call home.
Or, I’ll do it on my own.
Again.
JC
Valentines Day
Evolution of Will: Living in a Man’s World the past 2,000 years – Woman’s World ready to be TASTED!
Who is the Weaker Sex? Who is stronger? Let the Games begin. First let’s review past performance of the sexes and what Collective MALE has brought to the Game called LiFE and what Collective FEMALE has brought to the game called life.(which is helping it continue and which is helping it end?)
Past performance and scores now tallied.
New Female Leadership for Earth NOW beginning it’s Peaceful, but Powerful TakeOVER. Who loves LIFE and cares for LIFE better – MEN or WOMEN through the ages? Who is really stronger and by what variables is strength measured? Emotional strength. Spiritual Strength. Strength to survive in brutal man world.
Evolution.
Who survives and why?
Earth in for BIG change.
Old worlds and New worlds collide in the NOW. I will break it down for you simply. Who has heard, said, believed or felt the following statement as True…
‘You are living in a Man’s World.’
All of you? Correct. That’s because you have been. And if you are suffering…maybe you will now realize why. Perhaps now, male or female you will be more open for the change…because ‘Man in charge with Woman Weak’ paradigm has consequences that you are most likely a slave to at this very moment. This paradigm is now being overthrown by powerful women and the men who love us.
A man’s world….What does this statement mean? History will answer that for you. His Story. He is the law maker, the law breaker, the law enforcer. The bringer of War. The Self commanded teacher of religions, He will be the ruler in the home. The first rank. The lead commander. He will decide who is given what. He will decide who is better than who (happy with boy baby – don’t like girl baby). He will make his gender the Ruler and the other Gender – Female – the extra, the servant, the receptor of his ‘power’/seed, his reproducer, his punching bag, his follower. He will make her weak. He will try to make her dumber. He will devalue her. He will cover her up. He will try to silence her and keep her separate from other women. He will try to keep her smaller than he (impossible – but he tries)
These values of male/female will be accepted as tradition and ‘the way things are.’ If you come from a Man’s world you do not speak out against his ‘authority.’
HE will betray the human race life code of ethics and LOVE. He will kill. He will like to play with killing machines. He will be obsessed with death and pain. He will misuse his sex organ for making violence. He will correlate physical strength with his strength as a man. He will possess and he will try to dominate. Following HIM will bring the world to it’s current state NOW. Terror. War. Famine. Sodomy. Murder. Empty sex with Pain and Suffering everywhere. Insanity.
We will have to transcend being part of A teaching of manhood in the human race of male programming to devalue and defame LIFE and the Female in every way. A race of males that uses females for pleasure, anger release, or as reproduction machines to be used as often as possible so that it will feel stronger in numbers too. A race of demented male mentality ruling your hearts, brains, governments and religions
This Mans world is nothing new to EARTH or Woman. Or children.
Welcome to the conditional world of Mortal Earth Man. HELL. He makes himself Superior. He is a slave to weakness while playing strong with humanity paying the dear cost.
Man setting up a system which betrays LIFE, personal responsibility and the Feminine Power. Look at it closely.
Women have to receive this male energy and live with it. Survive it. We have to share Earth with a Male dominated mentality which is Mortal and Powerfully Resistant to Life, Love and Happiness. Just ask George Bush. He tells us on t.v. that he has a very hard job. Yes, it is terribly hard to fight all the time and live behind the scenes in paranoia. Please, George – let me show you how it is done the simple and easy way.
Evolution tells you it is the Female who assures tribes survive because she uses her God given Life energy to care for the offspring. (spreading LIFE) Even if dark male spirit put his seed in her without her pemission. Female instinct is to feed what comes out of her. To Love. Help life live.
The current American Government regime is designed to kill you. Whether you live somewhere out there or inside it’s ‘boundaries.’ Whether you believe it or not. It is true.
Why? Because it’s foundation is faulty because Mortal Men are running the show.
They know no better – it is the sign of the times. Yet, now I must ask you, Who is better qualified to be the Commanding Officer of Bringing Freedom and Peace to the World – Our George Bush or Me – a Female. Lady Liberty.
Stupid, asleep, pre- programmed Americans will still feel safer with George in charge with his War on Terror than ME a woman named Julie speaking for Liberty..
I’m tired of women addicted to weak men. And I’m really tired of emotionally and spiritually weak men putting themselves in charge and then taking us to war or raping us or our children. We will never get strong as female if we keep letting weak men rule us.
Females can now ween themselves off of weakness and their addiction to getting attention from weak males and looking to them for answers, Leadership, or Protection.
Women are being fooled because they cannot see while they are entwined within.
I say without them you are YOU.
Come with me and I will show you YOU
They are afraid of you because they are weak and are afraid of strong.
If you do not feel strong – know that you are a by-product of living in a (weak) ‘man’s world’ and be willing to let your addiction to weakness and MAN go.
Be addicted to strength by finding it in yourself. Then you will be able to see these men who surround you with clearer eyes and you will demand higher standards for your chosen partner to mate with!
If you put something in your hands (a gun) which is created to end life you mark yourself as a death ray and unwilling to walk the way of nonviolence. Non – human spirit in human vehicle acting out it’s desire to die and bring pain to itself and others.
To be human is to support life and feed the living with wisdom, food and kindness. Not bullets and semen and lies.
To support life. This is the Mother. Mother can be carried in males and females. First comes the desire not to kill! Self or another! The desire Not to hate. Self or another.
I say this….Earth will no longer be a playground for weak man disease to be inflicted upon its inhabitants any longer. Only a moron would think men are the stronger sex given the global state of affairs and the tallying of who’s been in charge through the ages! How are things going so far? How has Man treated his Female counterpart on Earth. For that matter, how has man treated himself? His offspring? Seems to me they are addicted to Death.
Men who can’t cry, don’t know how to process emotions and nurture it’s young are weak. Men who kill – sick. Men who can’t even clean up after themselves…pathetic. Emotional weakness. Mental weakness and Spiritual weakness combined with physical strength, erection, bullets and bombs. It is everywhere but now we can see it for what it is. Sick and Weak. We do a disservice to men if we allow this teaching to continue. Understand this and then look at that which calls itself ‘man’ and decide for yourself if he is attractive to you. Especially if he brings his ego in with his wallet and calls you a Gold Digger and hits you if you 'disrespect him'. Ugh. It’s time for the end of that era!
Who has made life hard on us and brought violence? Man. Take a look around. It should be obvious. Who has been in charge over the course of the last few centuries? Females have been programmed to believe we will die without man. Programmed to believe Women need a man. Why? To protect us? From what? Man. Our regimes globally have been set up for the Weak, Stupid and Angry Male to be in charge – does anyone question this?
The Truth is Man needs woman. And if he feels weak but wants to be strong, he will do whatever necessary to make sure he has what he wants as he wants it. He sucks energy from her in all directions. Look at your videos. It’s base programming for 3rd dimensional male.
Don’t continue to buy into that weakness ladies and stop devoting your time to getting a man! Someday, Yes, Have a man who meets your standards. A Divine and Enlightened man, But right now your standards are muddied and far too low. Become A whole human. First a female must be enlightened into her own mind/heart. She needs to rid herself of the lie pattern working it’s way through her body that relates her self worth to male opinion and/or treatment.
She must cast out her addiction to needing male attention to feel alive and of value on Earth. Sexual dependency on man. That is what the men want you to do but it is not what your Holy spirit desires for you to do. Decision time. Commitment time ladies.
The Era of Female Addiction to man is now ending. Weak man is out of style.
Buddha boys and men on path of enlightenment only kind worth spending any of your precious energy on. Leave the outdated weak small minded brutal boys to me. I am here to help them. The only way I can help them is to convince you to follow me and leave the men alone. Get to know your own energy and strengths. Learn the ART of BEING FEMALE before you go mixing it with weak male who disrespects the feminine. Don’t let him. Take yourself out of that game. It’s a Womans world now. We only play games with Men who know how to love, live, and serve LIFE.
Reprogram your brains, your yoni’s and your social structures. Build it from a female perspective. One of unity. Divine Feminine instincts. You must unite with your own power and higher consciousness individually in the mirror before you can represent female in the mating game and be able to choose properly and wisely and especially before you go reproducing and raising a little feminine spirit – male or female ! Your energy is needed in the world to help us heal ourselves of Man World. Stop wasting your precious energy. The Suffering Children on the planet are crying out for you to help them!
1st step – stop defining your Self or your value based on Mortal Male input! Get strong. Get out there and help! Join the Network and begin your life anew. Now. Amen.
Jan 2006 Tantric Fantasy for Purity in the White House
1.19.06 Greg in Person all night in my dream
Last night Greg and me had a chat.
All night it felt like. The dream was him explaining in no uncertain terms that we have no romance between us. Not in the Past. Not in the Now and not out there in some romantic fantasy land I have created.
He came to me in kindness. It was a class in acceptance for me and it was surprisingly easy. I handed him scene after scene of my hopeful visions of what I thought we could be and he struck each down with his freewill. He explained kindly that he did not have those types of feelings for me and it was not ‘our Destiny.’
All night I kept letting it sink in. I would transition to my awake life projects while in my dream and I would let it sink in. Then I would travel to some hope idea out there in the future and he would explain how it could not be and I would let it sink in. On and on it went. All night. Sinking in. Deeper. No romance.
Thank God my taking this information in was okay for me. It was such a relief to finally have an ending. It felt like I could really let it sink in because he was using the words and he was talking with me in person. I could not pretend anymore.
I did not resist. Instead, I felt relief because I was finally putting out each and every thought/vision/life experience and he would ground it into an ending. NO.
I woke up and headed to work to clean Lynn’s house with Sonam and Mary. I told Mary offhandedly about my dream just to make it real on the 3rd dimension with a witness.
In all universes and in all visions and in all lives – I accepted the reality presented to me in this one. Greg does not feel romantic love for, or with, me. Not in this or any life out there.
Okay. Got it.
Later in the day Sonam had me over for an espresso. We had a good chat, but I talk so much around her and am very aware how this whole journey has cramped my social skills. I didn’t even ask her a question about her. I just rambled about passion for female change and awakening in every topic we touched upon. I’m obsessed, but I don’t want to push people away by being ‘too much.’
She’s so cool I know she still has kind feeling for me even though I talk too much sometimes. It’s good for me to be with her – I have made it a habit of avoiding interactions with people rather than like I used to be – social and comfortable in chats with others. I’ve offended so many along the way – I think I am a little gun shy around people sharing myself and getting to know them.
She told me that a room was coming available at the Dharma Center and I should go tell Lama G that I would like it. She said to tell him soon so that someone else doesn’t get in line before me. I took it as an AWESOME sign that my energy is invited and compatible with the Dharma Center. I doubt just anyone can rent there. It felt like a hint that there will be a room for me available in Dharma Centers – Maui and otherwise. $500 or maybe less with work trade she said.
YEEHAW! I would be saving $500 a month and living in a temple. Perfect.
It has taken plenty long for me to establish myself securely on this island, but after today I feel the cycle has completed itself. I not only will have a bed to lay my head, but it will be in my own place I have here now which I pay for all by myself, or in the Dharma Center in the future months for even less than I pay now!
Win Win. Finally.
I got to this place by following every single hard time through to the end. This feels like The End. The end of hard insecure times for me living without resources on my own while ‘far away’ (literally, symbolically, and mentally!) from ‘loved ones’ and ‘home.’ I did it. I feel it.
After my visit with Sonam, I walked back across the street to my apartment and got home just in time for the Oprah Winfrey show on T.V. Todays show gave me such fun play signs of real magic occurring right here and now. Huge signs of a connection in process.
My dream in September 2003 put out on Earthlink trying to create a miracle for Harpo Productions to announce WHAT THE WORLD RAISED FOR ITSELF looks like it just might be happening right under her nose without her having a clue!
This is so great. I am going to Surprise Oprah. She doesn’t know about me or LOVINGNOW.com. I can tell. That means that someone who loves me and LOVES HER is putting something together for us to be a part of by us simply being ourselves.
How will she learn of my existence and heart felt feeling for her and desire to merge missions with her? How will she feel at that moment. Will she learn of me at the same time she learns that I am already gone? Will she be temporarily fooled for a divine purpose? We shall see, but this I know. I am in for the long haul and now I see it is not so long. Todays show says things are getting very very close to Completion and Revealing that which has been hidden….but very very loving and powerful!
Last night Greg and me had a chat.
All night it felt like. The dream was him explaining in no uncertain terms that we have no romance between us. Not in the Past. Not in the Now and not out there in some romantic fantasy land I have created.
He came to me in kindness. It was a class in acceptance for me and it was surprisingly easy. I handed him scene after scene of my hopeful visions of what I thought we could be and he struck each down with his freewill. He explained kindly that he did not have those types of feelings for me and it was not ‘our Destiny.’
All night I kept letting it sink in. I would transition to my awake life projects while in my dream and I would let it sink in. Then I would travel to some hope idea out there in the future and he would explain how it could not be and I would let it sink in. On and on it went. All night. Sinking in. Deeper. No romance.
Thank God my taking this information in was okay for me. It was such a relief to finally have an ending. It felt like I could really let it sink in because he was using the words and he was talking with me in person. I could not pretend anymore.
I did not resist. Instead, I felt relief because I was finally putting out each and every thought/vision/life experience and he would ground it into an ending. NO.
I woke up and headed to work to clean Lynn’s house with Sonam and Mary. I told Mary offhandedly about my dream just to make it real on the 3rd dimension with a witness.
In all universes and in all visions and in all lives – I accepted the reality presented to me in this one. Greg does not feel romantic love for, or with, me. Not in this or any life out there.
Okay. Got it.
Later in the day Sonam had me over for an espresso. We had a good chat, but I talk so much around her and am very aware how this whole journey has cramped my social skills. I didn’t even ask her a question about her. I just rambled about passion for female change and awakening in every topic we touched upon. I’m obsessed, but I don’t want to push people away by being ‘too much.’
She’s so cool I know she still has kind feeling for me even though I talk too much sometimes. It’s good for me to be with her – I have made it a habit of avoiding interactions with people rather than like I used to be – social and comfortable in chats with others. I’ve offended so many along the way – I think I am a little gun shy around people sharing myself and getting to know them.
She told me that a room was coming available at the Dharma Center and I should go tell Lama G that I would like it. She said to tell him soon so that someone else doesn’t get in line before me. I took it as an AWESOME sign that my energy is invited and compatible with the Dharma Center. I doubt just anyone can rent there. It felt like a hint that there will be a room for me available in Dharma Centers – Maui and otherwise. $500 or maybe less with work trade she said.
YEEHAW! I would be saving $500 a month and living in a temple. Perfect.
It has taken plenty long for me to establish myself securely on this island, but after today I feel the cycle has completed itself. I not only will have a bed to lay my head, but it will be in my own place I have here now which I pay for all by myself, or in the Dharma Center in the future months for even less than I pay now!
Win Win. Finally.
I got to this place by following every single hard time through to the end. This feels like The End. The end of hard insecure times for me living without resources on my own while ‘far away’ (literally, symbolically, and mentally!) from ‘loved ones’ and ‘home.’ I did it. I feel it.
After my visit with Sonam, I walked back across the street to my apartment and got home just in time for the Oprah Winfrey show on T.V. Todays show gave me such fun play signs of real magic occurring right here and now. Huge signs of a connection in process.
My dream in September 2003 put out on Earthlink trying to create a miracle for Harpo Productions to announce WHAT THE WORLD RAISED FOR ITSELF looks like it just might be happening right under her nose without her having a clue!
This is so great. I am going to Surprise Oprah. She doesn’t know about me or LOVINGNOW.com. I can tell. That means that someone who loves me and LOVES HER is putting something together for us to be a part of by us simply being ourselves.
How will she learn of my existence and heart felt feeling for her and desire to merge missions with her? How will she feel at that moment. Will she learn of me at the same time she learns that I am already gone? Will she be temporarily fooled for a divine purpose? We shall see, but this I know. I am in for the long haul and now I see it is not so long. Todays show says things are getting very very close to Completion and Revealing that which has been hidden….but very very loving and powerful!
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